Day 16. 33,054 words. Total wish fulfillment.
Today Si and Seth reunited after a few pretty big arguments and lots of tomfoolery. It was completely wish fulfillment writing this. Seth and I both wanted to avoid having much discussion with Si so that he wouldn't put his foot in his mouth, so here's what happened...
Usually, when the sun was just a streak of red on the horizon and a persistent afterglow in the sky, I would start to feel a pleasurable kind of melancholy. I felt lonely. I would wrap my arms around my shoulders, wishing someone were there with me. I would imagine that someone sitting behind me on the steps, dropping their chin into my hair, kissing the top of my head. I would imagine us sitting in silent appreciation of the night sky, our bodies humming along the same frequency, resonating together.
So I confess that I wasn’t too surprised when one evening, I was staring out and trying to identify the moment when the sun really and truly disappeared behind the curve of the horizon, when that someone ambled up the path leading to my cottage and stood on the steps below me.
“Simon Greengage,” I smiled.
“Seth Kayte,” he smiled back, and walked up the steps, settling himself behind me on the stairs just as he had in my daydreams. As his arms encircled me, I leaned back against him and we enjoyed the silent sunset together.
Stars were beginning to appear in the violet sky when I shivered from the chill. That action stirred us both from our stillness and I stretched my body, stood up, and looked him in the eye.
“I wanted to see if you had forgiven me,” he said.
“I’m not sure I have.” I said the words kindly, honestly.
Another, less comfortable, silence fell between us.
“Not completely,” I said. “But I feel glad that you’re here.”
“I’m glad, too.”
I walked up the steps to the cottage door and locked it.
“Hungry?”
“Very.”
We walked off down the beach. I had decided to take him to Millennium, because I didn’t want him to be recognized. The quiet intimacy I had felt when he arrived was still fragile; I wanted him all to myself.
We ended up at a table placed a little ways away from the rest. We clinked glasses of pinot grigio and shared one anothers’ entrees: mahi mahi for me, ahi sashimi for him. We also shared a slice of coconut cake for dessert and it was all I could do not to feed him spoonfuls of the rich, sugary treat. I still felt like I was in another world, another life, and nothing that I did here was real.
I had never felt so free, or so unworried about consequences. So perhaps that’s why when I paid our bill (over his protests) and we stood to leave, I held him close to me for a few seconds before taking his hand and leading him back over the sand towards the cottage.
When we got there, we both stood looking out over the ocean together. I know I wanted to just postpone the inevitable conversations and negotiations and messiness that was bound to ensue, no matter what. He might have felt the same because after a moment he turned to me and his face grew serious. I wanted to postpone whatever he felt he had to say, and so I quickly interrupted.
“I want to go swimming. And then I want you to come inside with me. I’d like you to spend the night.”
He laughed, maybe shocked at how forthright I was, and then suddenly stopped himself from laughing when he saw me turn away. I had wanted to live out my daydreams of Si and I together, so easy and true and right, and he had laughed. He touched my arm, lightly, and when I turned back to him, smiled.
“I’d like that, too.”
Without speaking I stripped off my tshirt, shorts and flip flops, and ran into the waves in my underwear and sports bra. He ran after me, dressed only in a pair of polar bear boxer shorts. Of course, with an invitation like the one I had extended to Si, we didn’t cavort in the water for long. His eyes looked large in his pale face as I reached for him and pulled him to me in a long kiss.
On our way into the cottage we didn’t notice we had left our clothes in a pile on the beach.
PS I MISS THE BLOGS. PLEASE PLEASE UPDATE TO KEEP ME COMPANY!
Usually, when the sun was just a streak of red on the horizon and a persistent afterglow in the sky, I would start to feel a pleasurable kind of melancholy. I felt lonely. I would wrap my arms around my shoulders, wishing someone were there with me. I would imagine that someone sitting behind me on the steps, dropping their chin into my hair, kissing the top of my head. I would imagine us sitting in silent appreciation of the night sky, our bodies humming along the same frequency, resonating together.
So I confess that I wasn’t too surprised when one evening, I was staring out and trying to identify the moment when the sun really and truly disappeared behind the curve of the horizon, when that someone ambled up the path leading to my cottage and stood on the steps below me.
“Simon Greengage,” I smiled.
“Seth Kayte,” he smiled back, and walked up the steps, settling himself behind me on the stairs just as he had in my daydreams. As his arms encircled me, I leaned back against him and we enjoyed the silent sunset together.
Stars were beginning to appear in the violet sky when I shivered from the chill. That action stirred us both from our stillness and I stretched my body, stood up, and looked him in the eye.
“I wanted to see if you had forgiven me,” he said.
“I’m not sure I have.” I said the words kindly, honestly.
Another, less comfortable, silence fell between us.
“Not completely,” I said. “But I feel glad that you’re here.”
“I’m glad, too.”
I walked up the steps to the cottage door and locked it.
“Hungry?”
“Very.”
We walked off down the beach. I had decided to take him to Millennium, because I didn’t want him to be recognized. The quiet intimacy I had felt when he arrived was still fragile; I wanted him all to myself.
We ended up at a table placed a little ways away from the rest. We clinked glasses of pinot grigio and shared one anothers’ entrees: mahi mahi for me, ahi sashimi for him. We also shared a slice of coconut cake for dessert and it was all I could do not to feed him spoonfuls of the rich, sugary treat. I still felt like I was in another world, another life, and nothing that I did here was real.
I had never felt so free, or so unworried about consequences. So perhaps that’s why when I paid our bill (over his protests) and we stood to leave, I held him close to me for a few seconds before taking his hand and leading him back over the sand towards the cottage.
When we got there, we both stood looking out over the ocean together. I know I wanted to just postpone the inevitable conversations and negotiations and messiness that was bound to ensue, no matter what. He might have felt the same because after a moment he turned to me and his face grew serious. I wanted to postpone whatever he felt he had to say, and so I quickly interrupted.
“I want to go swimming. And then I want you to come inside with me. I’d like you to spend the night.”
He laughed, maybe shocked at how forthright I was, and then suddenly stopped himself from laughing when he saw me turn away. I had wanted to live out my daydreams of Si and I together, so easy and true and right, and he had laughed. He touched my arm, lightly, and when I turned back to him, smiled.
“I’d like that, too.”
Without speaking I stripped off my tshirt, shorts and flip flops, and ran into the waves in my underwear and sports bra. He ran after me, dressed only in a pair of polar bear boxer shorts. Of course, with an invitation like the one I had extended to Si, we didn’t cavort in the water for long. His eyes looked large in his pale face as I reached for him and pulled him to me in a long kiss.
On our way into the cottage we didn’t notice we had left our clothes in a pile on the beach.
PS I MISS THE BLOGS. PLEASE PLEASE UPDATE TO KEEP ME COMPANY!
I wonder why Si selected those polar bear boxer shorts. I hope that this will be revealed at some point! This was my favourite part: "I would imagine us sitting in silent appreciation of the night sky, our bodies humming along the same frequency, resonating together." That just sounds so lovely.
ReplyDeleteIt sounds like you're having a lot of fun with your story. I think that I'll take a page out of your book and engage in some wish fulfillment next time I sit down to write. This is supposed to be fun!
What a lovely excerpt! It's a great treat to come back to the cottage and catch up on your novel. Can't believe how far you've gotten with it. Not sure if I am supposed to be rooting for Si or not, but it was very nice to see Seth so happy and content.
ReplyDelete